You've Got to Have a Carrot

“You’ve got to have a carrot.” Standing outside my friend Dana’s house after our morning summer walk, she spoke these words to my heart. And I let them soak deep.

We’d been talking about our kids, how setting a goal can motivate them to push through challenges—goals like getting into a dream college, achieving a personal best score, making the varsity team, that kind of thing. If they know where they’re going, they’ll be more likely to try hard to get there. As opposed to wandering, aimless, without a carrot to chase. You’ve got to have a carrot.

As a growth consultant for Christian schools, Dana knows about vision casting. Motivation needs a goal in order to awaken—a picture of the future state. It’s true in business and it’s true in life. And not just for our kids.

It applies to us seasoned women, too.

When our kids grow up and leave home, it’s easy to feel lost for a while. Unsure of what’s next. We’ve spent decades knowing our job every day—see the kids off to school, cook dinner for a house full of people, juggle schedules and needs and conversations.

And then the house gets quiet, and we have a choice. Look to the future as an empty canvas, or draw a target. A carrot. Something to work toward, dream toward, live for.

What is your carrot?

My sister started an Etsy shop after her girls moved away. My friend Anne sought a job in women’s ministry. My friend Cindi took acting lessons and signed with an agent. I’ve known many women who drew their carrots in the shape of new careers, entrepreneurial pursuits, personal goals of all kinds. Me? I wrote another book. There is always a carrot if you look for it.

But the carrot isn’t just a goal. Not just another thing to add to the to-do list. Your carrot, my carrot—they’re a sign of hope. That the best years are always yet to come.

“My heart says of you, ‘Seek his face!’ Your face, Lord, I will seek.” (Psalm 27:8)

Ultimately we were created to look forward, to follow the Bible’s vision of a heavenly Father who loves us, maps out good plans for us, and promises “the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living” (Psalm 27:13). 

So if you’re in a season of wandering, remember this: Your carrot is already dangling in front of you, planted there by a Father who’s never finished writing your story. Seek His face, and watch what He does next.